:: i dont want you to call me up no m0re saying u need me,Youre crazy if u think just half your love could ever please me still-i want to hold u, touch u. when you look at me that way .. theRe is only one solution-i know u gotta stay awAy from me - s t a y . a w a y . f r o m . m e ::
:: The hardest thing you'll ever have to do is stop loving someone because they stopped loving you ::
:: every now and then i wish it were then instead of now ::
:: i dont know what im doing anymore, i dont know what i wanna see, my world used to be worth living for, and now its hard enough just to be me ::
:: you can be told you are beautiful everyday, people can say your perfect in every way, but you dont believe it, not for one minute, cus the one boy you care for, wont admit it ::
:: dont be suprised if one day i avoid you and im gone, its not cus u did something and i hate you.. its cus im afraid to be in love with someone who wont love me ::
:: no more crying, these tears have dried, no more wishing, your stars have died, no more thinking, things are different this time cus i never want you back in my life ::
:: sometimes you just gota let go of him and hope he grabs onto you ::
:: i always have a habit of falling too fast and getting my hopes up for shit that dont last ::
:: but if i continue to push -- > you'll just pull away ::
:: i used to smile when i told people you were mine, but now i cant even smile and say your name in the same sentence ::
:: take me back to the way it was not so very long ago ::
:: so he doesnt like me, thats okay, i can deal. it was after all, only a crush. ill find someone new. ill move on. yeah right.. move on to a new part of him that i can obsess about. move on to another 'get him' from 17 magazine. moving on.. okay sure.. you try and get over a guy like him ::
:: i wish i could turn around and walk away from what happend with us, but i cant cus i know you wont come after me and thats what really kills me ::
:: true love? i used to believe it existed, but when youve had your heart thrown to the floor and stepped on, you just dont care anymore ::
:: i wonder if hes told her shes the best hes ever known the way he told me every night that we were alone. shell find out when the new wears off, he'll find somebody new, shell learn what the heartaches all about, and what im going through ::
:: a promise is a promise, thats what people say, welcome to reality, they're broken everyday ::
:: when i see your face i still get butterflies, when someone talks about you it still brings tears to my eyes, when you touch me my stomach still turns, i guess ill have to put with everyone saying 'that girl never learns' ::
:: the next time you see him theres some things i want you to do, i want you to tell him i dont still love him and tell him i dont still miss him, but please, dont tell him i said this all with tears in my eyes ::
:: its so amazing.. one morning you will wake up knowing hes yours, and then one morning you will wake up knowing hes hers ::
:: i know that everyone makes mistakes and that we are supposed to forgive and forget, but sometimes someone makes a mistake that hurts you so bad its hard to forgive and impossible to forget ::
:: i dont wanna quit, but shit i feel like this is it ::
:: i hate the way you make me feel - so wanted and loved yet you turn around and do the same to someone else -you play every girl tell them all the same stuff - > that u-wont hurt them nd you wont lie - i jus cant wait til they-all find out the real you - like i finallly did - then movE on ::
:: one day your gona wake up and realize how much you love me and when that day comes im gona be snuggled up beside someone who already knew they loved me ::
:: suck it up and walk away, he doesnt love you but dont worry, ull find that one someday ::
:: in all my life ive never found what i couldnt resist, what i couldnt turn down, i could walk away from anyone i ever know, but i cant just walk away from you ::
:: one problem with love is that you can love whoever you want, but then again so can he ::
:: im sick and tired of pretending that everythings okay, my tears are starting to show, and my smiles fading away.. ::
:: he was the one person i could count on and trust with my life, i depended on him with everything, my best friend, and now hes gone.. i miss you ::
:: sometimes i remember the darkness of my past, bringing back these memories, i wish i didnt have, sometimes i think of letting go and never looking back, and never moving forward, so there'd never be a past ::
:: the only thing worse than having a broken heart is knowing that for just one more night with him you'd go through that heartache all over again.. ::
:: why did i act like you mattered? it was silly of my to believe that if i just opened my heart things would come naturally.. jokes on me ::
:: not all scars show, not all wounds heal, but sometimes you cant see the pain someone feels ::
:: ive always been a tough girl.. one who keeps her shit tight, the fact that im slipping proves something aint right.. ::
:: you wonder how it feels to walk a mile inside the shoes of a girl like me? who dont got a thing to lose, could u step in my shoes and walk just a mile and after all the hurt still manage to smile? ::
:: a little confused, feeling a little a abused, i guess you could say i was used ::
:: i used to be normal, young and happy, now im left a broken image of the girl i used to be ::
:: i miss the days when just hearing your name made me smile ::
:: If you looked inside a girl's mind you'd see how much she cries You'd find secrets hidden, boyfriends and lies But what you'd see the most is how hard it is to stay stong When nothing is right and everything is wrong ::
:: another lesson I didnt get to learn, you're my obsession, ive got nowhere to turn ::
:: first you skip, but now you slip, sure is sad seeing a guy thats whipped, just a puppet to sink below, she's using you, all for show ::
:: its easy to believe someone when they're saying exactly what you want to hear ::
:: looking at the pictures of the past, thinking of how the years went by so fast ::
:: sometimes i wish i could go back to when boys meant yuck and friends were new, dreams were unshattered, worries few, when recess was too short and life too long, decisions came too easy, without a need to belong, when storks delivered babies, and passions werent so strong, friendships were unbroken, and right was right and wrong was wrong, when bad things didnt happen, when only skinned knees brought tears, and the night light quieted all our fearsm when farewell meant only for summer, all friends didnt part, and the fun went on forever, never leaving a broken heart ::
:: sometimes i wish i could go back to the old days, when i was six, when my biggest problems was what kind of dress to put on my barbie's or whether or not i had enough legos to buid a fort ::
:: i hated the person he had become, the person that loved me then changed. changed into someone who left me in ruins. as i hated the person he became, why do i love him still? perhaps it is the memory of the happy times of what i know is still there. or maybe i just dont want to admit i cared so much more than he ever could.. ::
:: the most pointless - - useless thing that you could ever do is fall for someone that will -never- fall for you ::
happiness .. its been no friend to me
:: i guess i just have to learn to accept that you arent the person i once knew, and we arent the best friends we once were.. ::
:: love can his so hard and so fast, and blind you to think it will last, but it can leave you with only memories of the past ::
:: .. and when you feel like your heart has been torn out and broken in two, and you feel like the world is ending, then we can discuss being ;just friends; ::
:: see i made up my mind cus i wasted my time, aint nothing here to keep me warm ::
:: you could tell by the smile on my face that for the first time i was truly happy - - now that feelings gone ::
:: Yeah i fell for you.. but what matters is i got back up.. ::
:: you cant do this to me, you cant act like you want me one day and you dont the next, its one or the other ::
:: do you remember when we were best friends? when we'd share our every thought? every smile? and every laugh? oh, and do you remember when you broke me heart? because i seem to remember that more than anything ::
:: people wonder why i cry acting as if they care, but the only person i wish cared, doesnt even know im there ::
:: all i can do is lay in my bed with tears rolling down my cheeks and .. remember ::
:: she walks the world in total confusion, her carefree attitude is all an illusion. after he left, something happened to her. she lost herself, her lifes a blur. she keeps all her feelings inside. with no one suspecting how often she cried. with all this pain locked tight in her heart. she'll never be able to make a new start. now you listen well, and take this advice: even though love can hurt, sometimes its worth the price ::
:: forget the day i liked you, forget the day i cried, forget the day i needed you, forget i ever tried ::
:: i wont let my future be based on my past, in other words -- i wont let my future be based on you ::
:: when things go wrong i wanna turn to you, but the thing is, i dont have you to turn to ::
:: the cracks in the concrete just remind me that no matter how strong you are, youll just fall apart anyway ::
:: im just wondering, does it hurt you to know that everytime i see you i feel like crying? that when i see your face, something inside me dies just a little bit more. or when i see you frown, i want more than anything to kiss your pain away ::
:: ill throw it all away, nothing has changed, everything is the same, i walked away far too late, now pretend everything is okay ::
:: in the end, the only one that gets hurt is the only one that ever really truly cared ::
:: when you finally realize that you didnt matter to someone, you begin to wonder if you matter to anyone ::
:: everyone tells me that i should just forget about him, that he doesnt deserve me. well they're right, he doesnt deserve me, but dont i deserve him? ::
:: how can you just walk away from me when all i can do is watch you leave? because we've shared the pain, even shared the tears. youre the only one who really knew me at all. i wish i could just make you turn around and see me cry. theres so much i need to say to you, so many reasons why. you're the only one who really knew me at all ::
:: theres only one cloud in the sky, and its raining on me, somehow im not suprised ::
:: i try to put on such an act around you. that way you cant see how much my heart breaks everytime you're near ::
:: unperfect -- thats what you can call me, after all, i am me. i dont fit in a certain category, im just a girl who lives life day by day and always manages to put a smile on my face even if that day im a complete mess ::
:: its hard to grow up in a society where you'll never be the pretty girl. everyone else seems to have something your missing. all the dreams you wish are just one cloud above you ::
:: i never stopped loving him, i just stopped letting it show ::
:: sometimes i wish i had never met you because then i could go to sleep at night not knowing there was someone like you out there ::
:: theres so much behind my smile -- you just dont know ::
:: the worst feeling in the world is having to doubt something you thought was unquestionable ::
:: future dreams can never last, when you find yourself still living in the past ::
:: you were at one point the best thing that ever happened to me bc not only were you my best friend, but you taught me what love was, and now.. well your the worst thing that has ever happened to me bc you taught me what a real heartbreak is .. ::
:: ive heard the speech a million times before, you can do better, you deserve more, i get myself sick over it cus i kno its true, but i dont want better, i just want you ::
:: i was always the strong one, the one everyone could count on. where there were problems, i would be there, trying to help solve them. i was there to help and to counsel, but now i need help. who is there for me? when i need them the most, i am all deserted and alone.. ::
:: sometimes you just have to fight you fears, hold back your tears and keep telling yourself everything will be okay ::
:: sometimes shit is missunderstood, but this boy took something no one else could ::
:: when i look into your eyes theres nothing there to see, nothing but my own mistakes staring back at me. never thought id see this day we drifted apart.. ::
:: i made a lot of stupid mistakes in my life, but the worst one was thinking that the one who alawys hurt me, would never hurt me again ::
:: he fell for her, and i fell apart ::
:: i have a wall you cannont see bc it is deep inside of me. it blocks my heart on every side, and helps emotions there to hide. you cant reach in, i cant reach out, you wonder what its all about. the wall i built that you cant see, results from insecurity. each time my tender heart was hurt, the scars within grew worse and worse. so stone by stone, i built a wall, thats now so thick it will not fall ::
:: its amazing how someone can break your heart and you still love them with every broken piece ::
:: this time its over, im keeping my heart, im gona be strong and not fall apart. itll get better, ill no longer cry, in a couple of weeks i wont want to die, i wont want to go back, ill be able to sleep, it wont hurt so bad, and wont feel so deep ::
:: the only thing standing between me and total happiness is reality ::
:: im just wondering why i feel so alone, why im a stranger in my own life ::
:: when my last teardrop falls, i will stand tall, and keep all our memories, and all of what we used to be ::
:: he can be so nice, then so mean. he can care and protect, make you laugh, and at the same time play games with your head. and after he's done with that, he'll tear your heart out, rip it in to the smallest fragments known to man and leave it on the floor, while all you can do is stand there, not being able to cry bc your so numb, bc you thought that there was something there, when really, there was nothing but a wayward boy out to break a poor girls fragile heart all bc he didnt know what he wanted.. ::
:: i would like to stay a secret, like walking in the dark, if no one knows you, no one cares, and no one breaks your heart ::
:: sometimes it hurts more to smile in front of everyone, then to cry alone ::
:: i dont want to start liking you again, only to have my hopes shattered again, my heart broken again, my heart torn out again ::
:: i have wasted thousands and thousands of kisses on you. kisses that i thought were special bc of your eyes and ur lips and all of ur color in life. i used to think that was real when you smiled. but now i know you dont mean any of it. shame on me for kissing you with my eyes closed so tight - that thing you do ::
:: the hardest things to let go of are the things you never really got a chance to hold onto ::
:: im sick of the excuses that you want me to believe, ive been understanding, giving everything u need, u used me, its over now, and soon your gona see im done with you ::
:: i wont hang around forever, thats not what im about, i wont stand in line to fall behind, thats the kind of love i can do without ::
:: let me ruin your life, let me break your heart, then ill ask you why we cant be friends. let me rip ur world into little pieces, let me destroy who you thought u were, and then ill ask if we can still be friends ::
:: times passed, the pain and memories faded, i went on with my life, saw other people and forgot you existed. but then i saw you that night, and i forgot i ever moved on ::
:: theres only so much a girl can take, and theres only so much a girl can swallow or tolerate, to the point she just breaks ::
:: you dont know what ive been through, so dont even say you do, you can tell me that ya understand, but really, ull never have a clue ::
:: i dont know if im getting over you or if im just getting used to the pain ::
:: cus my stomach feels like someone just punched me really hard, i cant breathe, my chest feels like its gona collapse, and i have the biggest lump in my throat, so this is what a broken heart feels like ::
:: tell me how am i supposed to live without you, now that ive been loving you for so long? how am i supposed to live without you, how am i supposed to carry on, when all that ive been living for is gone? ::
:: guys -- they promise you the world. but how many girls do you see carrying around life-size globes? you dont. in fact, i dont even want the world. i just want to be his world. and if thats asking too much, i would just like to be in his world, or at the very lesat, within his field of view.. ::
:: maybe it wasnt good enough, but i gave you all i could.. ::
:: no one knows my struggle, they only see the trouble, not knowing its hard to carry on when no one loves you ::
:: i thought i lost you somewhere, but you were never really there at all ::
:: a broken heart continues to beat ::
:: by the time i find someone who loves me, my heart will have been broken too many times to have the heart to love another person ::
:: sometimes you dont know what its like to be in those shoes, you cant possibly imagine being in those shoes, you dont know the heartache, the sleepless nights, the endless tears, you couldnt know how i feel, simply because you arent me ::
:: the worst pain in life is a one on one struggle, head against heart ::
:: a guy can only let a girl down so many times before she finally just gives up ::
:: as my heart lies in broken pieces upon the ground, you dont even know the pieces exist ::
:: i dont want you to hurt anymore, i want you to be happy for a while, and i truly do mean it, when i say a million of my tears is worth just one of your smiles ::
:: as we grow older it becomes difficult to just believe, its not that we dont want to, but too much has happened that we.. just cant ::
:: i cant get mad at you for hurting me over and over again, bc over and over again i let you ::
:: music is supposed to be an escape, its supposed to be somewhere you go where you can be yourself, or be watever u want to be ::
:: i cant believe i just gave up, i just let you drop out of my life, i tried to make you stay. then one day it just got too hard and i saw what you really wanted, a life without me ::
:: what if i said you never really mattered, that i never lost one minute of sleep over you, wheat if i crushsed all your dreams and broke all the promises that i swore to keep, tell me, how would u feel, how would ur life be, if i did to you, what you did to me ::
:: ive been trying not to love you, ive been putting up a fight. ive been barely holding on, and letting go with all my might. theres a part of me thats empty, i know only love can fill, im afraid ill never find it, and scared to death i will ::
:: when you feel like youve had it up to here, and ur mad enough to scream, but ur sad enough to tear, thats rock bottom ::
:: just when you thought you've lost everything, you find out you can lost a little more ::
:: I cant do this anymore, ive been strong, now i just cant. no more calm and cool. i cant lie anymore. im not as strong as you thought i was. im breaking down and theres nothing i can do ::
:: as i sit here with my eyes full of tears, all i can seem to think of is the feeling i had when you were near. but now that your gone my world became so cold. as the days go by i realize all of the pain love gives and how much i would go through for just one more kiss ::
:: once upon a time i was falling in love, no im only falling apart ::
:: i want you to scream and yell, get mad at the stupid things i do. then at least id know you still cared ::
:: Im not gona cry and im not gona care bc that never seems to get me anywhere, so if silence makes you happy and being with her makes u glad, then goodbye forever baby, ill never forget what we could have had ::
:: i made the choise to finally go bc i can stand this pain, its time for my last tear to fall and me to smile again ::
:: what does it feel like to be perfect? what does it feel like to have all the boys after you? loving everything you do, what does it feel like to be noticed by everyone, to be the center of attention, to have people care about you? what does it feel like to have a million friends? to go out every friday night? what does it feel like to have the perfect hair, to have such a perfect face, you dont even need an ounce of makeup. what does that feel like? what does it feel like to be rich, to have every material item you've ever desired? what does it feel like, what does it feel like to be loved?
:: i wanna do exactly what you did to me, lead you on, make u fall for me, then just let u go.. effortlessly ::
:: when you walked outa the room that night, u took my heart with u, and now i cant get that back ::
:: always the friend.. never the girl ::
:: fear of rejection i kept my love inside, told my heart didnt want you, but i lied ::
:: im sick and tired of pretending everythings gona be alright, nowa days ive realized, its no longer worth the fight, hes not for me and now i can see the way things are -- and always gona be ::
:: u barely talk about it and im just here holding on, but boy i dont need to wait around, if ur feelings are gone ::
:: all to often we dont realize what we have until its gone too often we're too late to say im sorry i was wrong, sometimes it seems we hurt the ones we hold dearest to our hearts and we allow stupid shit to tear us apart, far too many times we let petty things get in our mind and by then its usually to late to see what made us so blind ::
:: i was over you, but then you had to smile at me. you may not realize it but it was the same smile you gave me after our kiss, that hug, after every moment we were together. i swear i was over you.. was being past tense.. ::
:: do u ever wonder why i turn away wen you look at me? its just i dont want you to see wat uve done to me ::
:: reality is just a fucked up dream and life is never wat it seems ::
:: ive come to the point where im not gona get upset, im not gona care, cus everytime i did, it got me nowhere ::
:: hope isnt much, but its all i have left ::
:: its weird, wen ur a kid u have this picture of how ur life is gona be, and it never crosses ur mind that its not gona end up like that ::
:: be careful wen u give ur heart to someone, bc wen u give ur heart to someone, ur not only giving them the power to love you, but the power to hurt u ::
:: wen u like a guy u wonder 'does he like me' and wen he finally asks u out all u do is wonder 'wens he gona break my heart' ::
:: life is full of secrets and lies, so wen u get screwed over, dont be suprised ::
:: all this pain ive been thru, all the tears ive shed, were bc of you. and its so hard to smile wen all i have left are tears ::
:: there you are holding her and im lost trying to understand ::
:: people say 'u can make it thru the rain' but fuck that, u will always feel the pain ::
:: someday ill find a way to shine, leave all these rainy days behind. in know theres gota be some place warm and bright for me, im running out of places i can run, looking for a place in the sun ::
:: its weird how like.. u think u know someone, and then, all of the sudden, u just dont know them anymore ::
:: sometimes its hard, u dont wana look over ur shoulder cus u dont wana remember where uve been ::
:: been running from these feelings for so long, telling my heart i dont need it, pretending i was better off alone, but i know that its just a lie, so afraid to take a chance again, so afraid of wat i feel inside ::
:: sometimes i wish i could be like you, being able to become so close to people that u have no intention of being close to, and then at any given point be able to push them away, but then i remember, wait, i could never be like u, i have a heart ::
:: i just want to feel safe inside my own skin, i want to be happy again, i just want to feel deep in my own world, but im so lonely, i dont even want to be with myself anymore ::
:: from the outside looking in you cant understand it, from the inside looking out you cant explain it ::
:: and does it make u sad to find urself alone? and does it make u mad to find that i have grown? ill bet it hurts so bad to see the strength that i have shown ::
:: when your lying in bed at night wondering if youll ever find someone who really loves you, youll look back at me and know i did, and thats the day you will regret walking away from me ::
:: take me as i am, or watch me as i go ::
:: just when you put it behind you, just when you forgot about where you have been.he comes back into your life and you realize you still need him ::
:: everytime they put her down, she makes a fist and tears roll down, she packs her bags and plans to run away from here ::
:: you cant hurt me anymore, im already broken, sure you can pick at the torn pieces, but nothing will hurt more than that first blow to my heart. so go ahead with your stupid lies and childish games. they dont hurt, i cant feel it, i already went numb ::
:: I'll be the one mistake you'll carry on.. forever ::
:: so you're breaking my heart into a million pieces and you're saying its because i deserve better? ::
:: i trick myself into thinking that it's gona be different this time. but it never is. its always just different shades of the same ::
:: it seems a little sad that i was the girl whose only purpose was to help you find out who you're really in love with ::
:: its the bitter taste of losing everything that i've held so dear ::
:: id rather walk alone, then chase you around, id rather fall myself, then let you drag me on down ::
:: thanks for waiting this long to show yourself, cus now that i can see you, i dont think you're worth a second glance ::
:: i hate being in this position. im forcing myself to let go of the one person i need in my life. you're the only thing that makes sense, but at the same time the one thing that complicates me. i know that im better off without you, but i feel empty whenever i try to let go. but i guess that emptiness is better than constant hurt ::
:: its weird, you know the end of something great is coming, but you want to hold on, just for one more second, just so it can hurt a little more ::
:: i want to thank you for making me see what its like to care for someone that much. i want to thank you for making me believe i was loved, and making me believe you wanted to be with me. thank you for hurting me, and showing me the world was real ::
:: im so afraid to love you, but more afraid to lose, clinging to a past that doesnt let me choose ::
:: im not mad at you, im mad at myself for believing you were something that your not, for believing that you were always gona be here for me, but the truth is -- ur not ::
:: i guess if ur done breaking me heart, i should leave ::
:: i guess to some extent you get used to being alone. you get used to not expecting phone calls and having nothing to do at night. you dont expect to turn around to open arms any longer. the small sounds of him have been replaced by silence. your thoughts echo through your head, with no one to share them with. all in all, being alone isnt terrible, it just hurts like hell ::
:: and if i meant as much to you as you claimed i did, you'd actually stop and consider my feelings for once ::
:: behind every fucked up girl, there is a guy that made her that way ::
:: we havent talked in a while, everything is so different, hes got his life and ive got mine. but all he has to do is smile and hes got mine again ::
:: if uve been hurt by the one you love, dont hurt him too, prove to him he was wrong to let you go. eventually he'll be hurt, realizing what a fool he was to let someone like you slip from his grip ::
:: you just have to learn to forget about the people who forgot about you ::
:: im not the same person i used to be, ill admit to you, shit got to me ::
:: someone asked me if i knew you, i thought about it for a while then said ' i used to ' ::
:: someone asked me if i knew you, i smiled and thought about everything we had done together, every talk, every laugh, everything, and as a tear came to my eye i said ' i once thought i did ' ::